сряда, 26 февруари 2014 г.

goodbye is the hardest word.

Just came back from a day of bountiful fun and laughter with tons of my college friends, many of which i have not seen for quite some time. It was crazy sharing our past in the present, sending them into an unknown future. Some of them are leaving to the States to further their studies soon, and it's just really sad to know that they're so far away soon.

There is so much i can relate to goodbyes..

Like how i was forced to say goodbye to my friends today. And not knowing when i'm going to see them another time. And what about those who're leaving but weren't here today? Having them to be part of my college experience was just really nice regardless of all the ups and downs everyone have had.

Like how i am trying hard to say goodbye permanently to my ex. Believe it or not, i still cannot seem to be able to move on completely from my previous relationship and every little thing i see that can be related to him throws me into a hollow of sorrows.

Like how i had to say goodbye to someone who was near perfect, in the sense that he fits every criteria i look for in a partner, and that we have a mutual attraction. But alas, separated by Fate and distance.

Like how i've to say goodbye to moments i cherish, like hanging out with friends today, and other moments of meeting someone who can really click with you and not be awkward sitting together in silence.

Like how i've to bade farewell to the Hope i have cultivated for a certain matter because i was let down by something or someone.

Like how i've to say goodbye to reality, and heading on to dream in my sleep and let my brain work me into excruciatingly painful or joyful dreams.

Like how i'm trying to say goodbye to all these melancholy by writing them out here, but i've a feeling it wouldn't help.

Also, like how i have said goodbye to this blog, leaving you guys for much more time with my books and rest.  I'm having my semester break now, so i hope i would be more inspired to blog about everything in my life with this amount of free time on my hands.

Goodnight, people.



Dedicated to Sam, Ashley, Yizhong, Nat, Tsu Sheng and all the other people i know who're leaving.. Please take care, guys. It was awesome that Fate brought us together, and we must make the effort to keep things connected. Love you guys, lots.
Posted by Qboy at 2:13 AM 5 strands of wisdom
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Sunday, May 29, 2011
of comebacks and reruns.
Ahhhhh.. It's been a while again since the last time i updated mah blog. Sorry people, first week back in KL and i was deprived of internet because my mobile broadband was terminated, and besides, college has been treating me like hell despite just starting like what, 2 weeks ago?

Much has been happening since i've came back to KL, hanging out with friends, having good food, chilling everywhere. Like how i just came back from Pavilion yesterday. Was supposed to go for my first ever facial (NO, NOT THE DIRTY ONE GUYS. NO. EW.) at New York Skin Solutions in Pavilion but it got cancelled coz some problems arose at the store, so it was postponed. We went anyway just to hangout and chill. And noooooo people, i'm not rich, the facial is only 15bucks. Friend of mine bought this offer from some online voucher/promotion thingy and this was like a 90%+ offer where the original price was nearing 1k. So we thought like, what the heck, let's give it a go. Haha.

Anyway, Gayvilion was so disappointing yesterday. No eye candies at all! Got la, a few really cute ones, but i want like a HORDE of them! Where did all them hot guys go ah? Hehe.

Besides, i've been meeting up some guys, and getting to know them etc. I think i'm having problems with controlling my feelings again.. But i'm trying hard to curb it. No worries. I've been quite majorly down in mood lately, maybe coz of my hurt finger. Yes guys, i hurt my finger. I accidentally cut it while cutting styrofoam, and it bled so much coz of the Warfarin i'm taking, and it required 5 stitches. I was distracted from mood swings that night, and hence the happening of the incident. Don't worry, i can still type properly with my left index finger heavily bandaged now, lol.

Back to KL was okay, and not okay. It's a big city- okay fine, big-GER city after all compared to the small city of Ipoh, and everything from people to buildings and environment, most of them feel so cold.. I just don't like it. I'd pick the warmth of Ipoh over KL anytime if you ask me.. But too bad, i'm stuck here for now. But thanks to the people i know, they've been making the experience here more bearable. Thanks guys :)

And i finally got to meet up with dancerboy and tuls! It's been sooooooooooooo long since i saw them! Was good to see them again :) And that night, MP was filled with so much cuties ;D My eyes were like having dry orgasms, lol.

So here are some pictures to end this post.. 

..hahahahhaha my hurt fingerrr! :P

Will try to update my blog more when i've the time! College's a bitch! So take care and stay tuned guys :P
Posted by Qboy at 11:41 AM 6 strands of wisdom
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Saturday, May 14, 2011
i'm missing you.
And so.. few months flew pass, with me ranting away exclaiming how boring it was back in my hometown. Now, i'm back, and about to resume my studies and the 'free' life (?), but i don't really look forwards to it anymore, somehow.

The main factor was that the few months staying in Ipoh, the presence of my family itself gave me wondrous and unlimited support and love, and undoubtedly i grew accustomed to it.

I cried during, and after my shower, right before leaving to KL on Thursday. I absolutely just dread leaving, and with the thought waking up to none of my family in a house full of anti-social fucktards, i know i'm in for another bumpy ride on the journey of life.

I'm missing my mom, and it wasn't easy to hold things back when i saw her trying to hold back her emotions when she was about to leave after dropping me off. I almost broke down. I did, but not in front of her. The look in her eyes, the sadness, and the longing, etched in my memories, enough to trigger a flowing river out of my eyes.

I've been missing my brother very much in particular, and again, crying. It's just so overwhelmingly saddening and tear-jerking to have someone you love and miss so much, tell you that they miss you too. He was talking to me on Whatsapp yesterday, and i told him i miss all of them, and he says they miss me too. And i could totally just sense how much sadness there was in his words. My sister-in-law even told me that my brother packed food for me, forgetting that i was back in KL already. Just shows how much he misses me.. And that breaks me, breaks my heart.

I will take care of myself, er ge, er sao, mummy and daddy. I will work hard for my studies. Please don't worry too much about me. I miss you guys tons and loads and i promise i'll come back more often. I will get through this, and i will be stronger. Because i have you guys to back me up, and love me, and give me the unconditional love and support.

Looks like, i finally found solace in family.

So as i'm back in this hellhole i call my room, i typed this out with heart-wrenching pain flowing down the sids of my face. Memories, regardless of good and bad, flashing through my mind. With the rain building up a momentum outside these prison walls, nostalgia seeped in even stronger.

I love you mom, dad, er ge, er sao, da ge, da sao, and baby. Miss you guys tons too.

I dedicate this song to you (guys), because you loved love me.
Posted by Qboy at 11:03 AM 5 strands of wisdom
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Wednesday, May 11, 2011
happy birthday to me :)
By the time this is posted, it would already be past midnight..

Which means i'm now officially 19 :)

Well.. So far only one friend of mine has sent me a birthday wish, but you know what, birthday wish or not, it doesn't really matter to me now :) With age, comes wisdom, and i really hope that will be my case. I want to be more compassionate, more helpful, more improved, more.. I just wanna be a better individual. I wanna experience life, all of it, so intense, like no one has. I want to learn from all of them and be inspired.

Happy birthday to me.

As i sit in front of the computer, in my room, only the whirring of the ceiling fan and the taps i'm making from my typing on the keyboard to be heard, i smile and wish myself a happy birthday. Being grateful that i'm now 19, and with plenty more years to go down the road.

I love myself.

I love life.

Posted by Qboy at 12:05 AM 11 strands of wisdom
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Monday, May 9, 2011
status update.


..but i'm not driving in KL or anywhere, anytime soon. Well you know, mums and their paranoia :l
Posted by Qboy at 1:21 PM 6 strands of wisdom
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Sunday, May 8, 2011
coming to an end; a fresh start.
Fellow readers, thank you for all the support and advices and the blog hits i've been receiving from all of you these few months, and accompanying me through all my thick and thin. The months of boredom and inactivity is going to be over soon!


And that, certainly means freedom. Heh. Which can also be interpreted into: no parents' control. And i can go out until late night, or i can go get my nightlife back! :P

Been feeling a little lazy to sit still and type even a paragraph since i last posted that song cover of mine.. Feeling uber uber lazy and tired all the time. I actually had 2 more baking attempts and they were quite a success! Would definitely share it with you guys in the posts to come! And dear Kidz here was fortunate enough to have the chance to taste one of it for me :P

Just a few days away from my return to KL, i've been planning plenty of meet-ups, activities with friends i haven't seen for a long time. Some let downs here and there from the planning, but i'm really glad these few months of being idle is finally over. And now with my blood clot almost gone, i've to start to live my life a different way, be more appreciative of everything i possess and the things around me, and ultimately myself.

This would be a short post, written just for the reason of updating my blog! Haha, so pleaseee be patient people! Another update coming very soon!

Love you all! :3

P.S.    Oh, birthday coming in a few days too! Too much to be happy for this week! :P

P.S.S. I'm taking my driving test again tomorrow, hope i won't make anymore stupid mistakes! Failed the road test previously lorrr, so sad :l A little butterflies in my stomach now :X *cross fingers
Posted by Qboy at 10:21 PM 3 strands of wisdom
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Tuesday, April 26, 2011
And so i was a little bored, and i was listening to this song. And there's this sudden push to make a song cover for it. Since i haven't did any for a while already, so yeah. Hope you guys enjoy it :P Comments/suggestions appreciated! :D